Ohaiyo 8 Into Alternaty
by Taka and Keichirou
Summary: /one shot/ Sanzo is unhappy.......and who is the man who is getting ohaiyoed? hahahahahahahhahahaha


Ohaiyo 8 Into Alternaty

By Sukunami Taka

Loose dusky hair twirled with the wind, long strands masking the petite pale face which was resting absent-mindedly against a delicate hand. Immense amber eyes opened to stare casually at the rippling lotus lake before him…..a bee hovered near one of the open flowers, the petals flaired like warm arms reaching to enclose the busy life in a protective embrace…

__

There is no death in Tenkai….yet is there life? I think not…..

A flash of gold passed by…..a lean heavenly man with deep violet eyes and shining blond hair stalked past in heated anger….a man with a chakra on his forehead and _short_ blond hair….

"Sanzo?"  
"Nani?"

"Isn't Konzen….but you…..what are you doing here?"  
"None of your business, gaki….."  
"I'm the fighting god, _monk_…"

"Not in my lifetime, you aren't…."

"Keep it up and you won't _have_ a lifetime…."

"Have respect……in my past life as Konzen, I had a higher status than you…."

"We aren't even in the same office, you documents babysitter…"

"Automatic killer.."  
"Female hermit…"

"……."

"Hello? Female hermit?"

"I………AM………NOT……A…….FEMALE……."

"Oooohhhhh…….sor……ry…." Nataku rolled his eyes and muttered, "Maybe you should get plastic surgery you bishounen-to-the-core-effeminated-piece-of-no-good-preacher……."

"Say _that_ again?"

"Sure….you bisho…………."

At this moment, a willowy very good….make that _extremely…_good-looking man entered. With his raven hair falling across pale azure eyes, he swept it back with one slender hand, while the other held a manuscript which he was ruffling through quickly……a look of confusion upon his face.

Sukunami Taka walked over to the two highly erratic men quickly, waving the script as he did so…..

"Ano………this scene is not suppose to be here……….."

Genjo Sanzo the rogue monk, simply glared at the writer and creator of the Ohaiyo series, while Nataku Taishi sat back nonchalantly, a hint of what was going on forming in his calculative head…..and he grinned….secretly, of course…..

Taka frowned, the slight smile gone, "Well? What's the matter?"

In response, _Sanzo_ glared even more, his perfect white teeth grinding together…….

Sighing, the honestly-over-worked youth turned to the boy fighting god, "Nataku, why is he acting like this?"

"I dunno…..you're writing this….."

"……………"

"Ask him yourself, then….."

"Sanzo? Nani-des? Dai jou bu des?"

"I…..Y…..A….."

"What's the problem? You aren't suppose to be in this scene……and Onegai! 2 only starts sometime later this week….."

"_That_'s the problem…"

"I don't understand…….you want to do Onegai! 2 now?"

"I……Y…..A….."

"You're spelling it out for me and yet it's not making any sense………what is it that you want?"

"You."

"Eh?"

"To."

"What?"

"Stop."

"San.."

"Putting."

"Zo…"

"Me."

"Eh?"

"In."

"Speak…"

"Your."

"Proper…"

"Madcap."

"Sentences…"

"Ideas."

"Please.."

"Like."

"What?"

"Ohaiyo."

"I…"

"Or."

"Don't…"

"I."

"Under…"

"Will."

"Stand."

"Kill."

"You…."

"You.

Silence filled the indoor garden, save the gentle calls of the birds. It took a moment for Sanzo's 'speech' to sink into Taka's mind and him to actually make out what it meant….  
"You don't want to be in Ohaiyo anymore?"

"Very good, pretty boy….you are not as stupid as you look……"

"Hey…..okay, okay…….anyway, you have to work in the new Onegais!…..atleast now you'll have more time……."

The flush of red returned to Sanzo's face and his arm reached out and grasped around the slim neck of Taka….

"Ok….let's go through it again, pretty boy……….I DO NOT WANT TO BE FEATURED IN ANY OF YOUR MORONIC IDIOTIC NEVER-FLATTERING ASS-LIKE PROJECTILES OF AN INSANE I-AM-HONESTLY-GOING-TO-KILL-YOU-GIVEN-THE-FIRST-CHANCE OF A FILTHY IDEA OF WHAT IS SUPPOSE TO BE HUMOR!!!!!!!!!! ANYMORE, UNDERSTAND!!!!!??????"

Currently, poor Taka is clawing at the firm hand that is inadvertently blocking his airways…thus his much needed oxygen….

"I AM SICK AND TIRED OF HOW YOU, YOU BASTARD-SON-OF-A-SWINE-WHO-HAVE-ABSOLUTELY-NO-IDEA-HOW-TO-WRITE, KEEP HAVING ME DO SOME SHIFTLESS CHAUVINISTIC INFERIOR ARGUMENTS THAT MAKE NO SENSE AT ALL WITH SOME GOD-FORSAKEN CHARACTERS THAT DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO BATHE!!!!!!!!!"

Nataku looked on amused, surprised that the writer was having a blasting, from one of his favourite characters nonetheless, but still enjoying it….

He helpfully offered some assistance, "You forgot backward ancient psychotic murderers and also abandoned worthless jackass that is good only to feed the dead with not a single noteworthy idea in his cramped mind.." The boy grinned apologetically at the unfortunate Taka who was seriously running out of air, but Sanzo merely snapped back..  
"Urusai, you only-know-how-to-f***-up-people's-lives-of-a-pygmy-dwarf-libidinous-lovechild!!!!!!!!!!!!"

(warning…graphic scene ahead…most of which has been duly edited for the safety of younger readers-ST)

Amber eyes narrowed.

"Is……that…..so…"

"You damn obsequious boot-licking garbage!!!!"

"SANZO!!!!!"

WHAM!

A powerful punch found its way to Sanzo's nose, breaking his achingly beautiful face. Taka has been thrown goodness knows where…..

Getting up precariously, blood dripped from Sanzo's face, now battered as his deadened violet eyes latched onto the small erect figure before him…  
"You grubby leech of an-infinite-sore-that-should-be-rubbed-off-the-face-of-the-earth..prepare to grovel for your pitiful non-existing life while I make you know THE MEANING OF HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Leaping with unknown force, Sanzo crashed onto the boy, his skeletal hands vengefully choking the brittle neck. Nataku flailed against the much heavier body, struggling to get a foothold, then he grabbed onto the robe and flung the monk over his body in a smooth judo move (Taught by Kanzeon Bosatsu no less). His agile frame easily bounded aside and he kicked up his over-towering sword……

"You want to taste death so badly, come on and get it!  
"Why you snide zealous kid!!!!"

"You miserable expired antique!!!!!!!"

"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"

The corrupted monk made what seems to be a karate chop which Nataku avoided with a smile, but then, he swung to the other side and swept the boy of his feet. The next thing he knows……a six-barrel pistol was cocked at the head of the fighting god……but he laughed….

"I am immortal……You can't hurt me….."

"Oh yeah……??" and his foot went forward, hitting with full force a particularly sensitive area that Nataku was sure to have felt….

(OUCH………)

With a satisfied smirk, Sanzo swiveled around and found Taka, lying rather pathetically in some bushes…rose bushes in fact, so now, he was riddled with small cuts all over..…

He pulled him up, and shook him with absolutely no care….

"NO MORE OHAIYOS….OR THAT OTHER ONE….UNDERSTAND???!!!!"

Taka nodded mutely, and was let go of…….his indifferent blue eyes stared after the diminishing silhouette of Sanzo, then one hand swept his hair back once more and he turned to the waiting figure of Nataku who grinned…

"Well?" the boy asked excitedly.

Taka laughed, "Sugoi des………another Ohaiyo done……."

And he draped an arm across the slim shoulders as the two walked off…..still maniacally laughing…..

Well, miinasan…….I'll wait a while for the reality to sink in…..you see what had happened right? If you didn't….well…..you simply missed out the point of this particular Ohaiyo……which is actually the last, I might add…..

I have run out of new ideas to continue the Ohaiyo series, though I would very much want to…….although there is a slight hope…..that is you, dear readers……..if you would care to request or send in some ideas, I would very much appreciate it, and thus a new Ohaiyo would be born……..till next time then…..ja, miinasan….. 


End file.
